One Year

Can't believe it. We've been here a year. Now is the time when I tell you how I feel about it, I guess.

I now understand why Shannon always said she had a love/hate relationship with Japan. I thought I would have many of questions about the culture answered, but instead, the more I see, the more confused I am. I guess I have to just accept a lot of things, the way Shingo does at my sporadic Japanese lessons: "I don't know why. Nobody knows why. We just do it like that."

For instance, I am really confused by the morality/sexuality question. Any given night, there will be a line of guys standing at the magazine rack at the combini, reading nasty manga full of mostly naked schoolgirls. You can get little plastic action figures of girls in lingerie in all sorts of suggestive positions. There are entire districts of Tokyo devoted to the sex trade, places where you can get services that involve hands, soap, and anything else. Love hotels are everywhere. It's all in your face, and perfectly legal. At on-sens (fancy bathhouses), dozens of perfect strangers are naked with each other. Yet the Japanese are some of the least affectionate, least physical, least sexy people I have ever met. It sort of reminds me of what I know about the Victorian era, when the publicly repressed society had the craziest fetishes in private, but...sex is totally in the public eye. I don't get it.

And the whole relationship with the US. Westerners, and Americans in specific, are considered on the whole, loud, obnoxious, and rude, and we dropped an ATOMIC BOMB on them. Yet they embrace everything commercial about America: McDonalds, Disney, hip-hop, surfer fashion, hot rods, Christmas and other holidays, Hollywood, Budweiser, and every kind of merchandising. It makes me confused and rather sad.

There are things I love about Japan. Like the food. I love it even more now. So much of it is fresh, and simple, and light. I will someday miss how I can go to a 7-11 and get a perfectly tasty, nutritious meal. I love the combinis themselves. I can buy liquor, cigarettes, lunch, a battery-powered phone charger, nail polish, and socks there, while paying my electric bill. And I am always 5 minutes on foot away from one. I love that there are so many zoos and parks and museums. I love the trains. I can get anywhere by a combination of a bus and a train or two. I love that the bars close at 5 in the morning, or later. They don't let you get all liquored up to kick you out the door at 1:45am to make your drunken way home. (If the trains ran all night, the system would be perfect. But there are always taxis.) I love some of the people I've met. An international bunch of people who have seen the world and know there is so much out there beyond their home countries. Helen! I love the attention to detail the Japanese give to wrapping things, even the simplest purchase. Japanese mayonnaise. I love that there are random stalls in odd places that sell yummy hot treats like yakitori and red bean-filled fish-shaped sweets. I love that you can always count on there being a vending machine just around the corner where you can get a refreshing cold beverage or a can of hot coffee when you need one. I love the traditional things, the food, the festivals, the temples, the kimonos that mix with the everyday traffic. My kids are hanging out with other kids of every nation and culture, and will always carry their experiences here with them. I love my combination washer-dryer and my shower room and my deep tub that fills itself.

There are always many things I don't like so much. Like the overwhelming cuteness of things. Grown people with Sesame Street or Disney characters hanging off their cellphones. Girls who look like plastic baby dolls, all adoring-eyed, ruffled and ribboned and bowed, feet crammed into tiny, pointy-toed, high-heeled shoes you know are destroying their feet. The surprising hideousness of most buildings exteriors. The fact that I have to fill out of a form, in a written language I am only just beginning to grasp, and go to the bank every month to pay my rent. I don't like that pretty much the only job I could get is teaching English. I don't like how ridiculously humid it is in the summer, or that I ruined a lot of my clothes during the rainy season because I wasn't aware that you have to buy things to protect your closet against mold and mildew. Chilled red wine. Most of all, and this is mostly my own fault, I don't like that I can't talk to most of the people around me, or read the signs. And I never feel really comfortable around people. I'm not sure how much about me is merely tolerated because I am gaijin and expected to behave that way. Most of the people I am surrounded by, and this is true anywhere, but magnified here, are simply not like me.

There are things that I both love and feel ambivalent about. Like how most snacks seem to taste like fish in some way. Or the campsites that have all the conveniences. Or the garbage separation. Bringing a gift of some kind any time you go to someone's house. The levels of politeness.

All in all, I am still glad we moved here. But I don't think I'll ever really belong here. And so, on this, our one-year anniversary, I can safely say, unless something drastic changes, we'll be here just one more year.

OK, reflection over. Back to our regularly-scheduled program of What I Did in the Past Week.

We went to a local pool. PoolS. There were three of them, for different swim-levels, and a skinny old lifeguard.


































We had a backyard BBQ.




















Jeff went to the states, and I took the kids to Chinatown and to the Yoshimoto Children's Aquarium. The most bizarre aquarium ever. Japanese are very fond of their fish. They are very tasty, and fish are funny. I guess.












































































Ever seen The Abyss? I'm convinced they got the idea for the ETs from these guys. They swim and have little flashy lights just like them.












































































This guy got nervous about his merch.





























Yeah, ramen-flavored candy.





























I didn't notice that the sign said "No Photo" until I looked at the photo. Oops.















Motomachi-Chukagai station. It's my favorite.

More pics of the comic aquarium and Chinatown with the kids here.

I went to a party at Kumi's mom's house. Same people as last time, just as drunken as last time. This is Cynthia. She's a preschool teacher.















We went to the Yokohama Science Center with Takako Kato and her kids. All about space and related topics. Very cool.











































This little girl was so skinny, she creeped me out.























































































































More pics of that stuff here.

Jeff'll be home any minute. Then he has to go to Sasebo tomorrow. Poor guy. The rest of us are leaving for Yamanashi with Wilson and family in the morning, and Jeff will meet us for the matsuri.